GO Team Hilary!

While LINDSAY LOHAN spends the last days of summer sunbathing on her boyfriend's back deck, HILARY DUFF is spending some time down in New Orleans, doing charity work for USA Harvest.


--Check out this video of Hilary bagging CANNED GOODS for the people still suffering the effects of Hurricane Katrina. . .

Oh Paula, Paula

Admit it. . . the thing you miss the most when "American Idol" isn't on the air is PAULA ABDUL under the influence of various substances. Well, here's a post-Emmy interview with Paula that should satisfy your craving.


--She appears to be pretty SLOSHED.

Check it out here. . .

Don't Screw With My Cartoons

Turner Broadcasting is reacting to viewer complaints by scouring more than 1,500 classic Hanna-Barbera cartoons to edit out scenes that glamorize smoking. While they're at it, they might as well get busy deleting some of these other. . .

--A wedding scene between Peppermint Patty and Thelma of "Scooby Do".


--Tweety and Sylvester caught raiding Granny's medicine cabinet for Percocet.


--The Powerpuff girls buying weed from Shaggy.


--The Smurfs wiping off their color to reveal they're all pure Aryan.


--Hong Kong Phooey viciously berating his Asian housekeeper.


The above are as ridiculous as censoring classic cartoons...granted new cartoons should send a more powerful message but ummm the message should come from home. You know the message to your kids about smoking, drugs, sex, etc. - yeah its you that needs to send the clear message not the idiot box.

No Bathing In The Fountain Please

In Munich, Germany they have some 183 public fountains all over the city. And we have absolutely no interest in 182 of those fountains. But that other ONE, the Lindwurm Fountain in the middle of town. . . well, we'd travel to Munich RIGHT NOW to see it.


'Cause every day, a 44-year-old homeless woman named Bille takes a NAKED bath in the public fountain. In broad daylight.


Oh. . . and did we mention she weighs a MOUTH-WATERING 330 pounds?!?


Bille's in there at least once a day. . . washing herself with the bottles of soap and shampoo that she brings.


She keeps getting fined for breaking public nudity laws. . . but, since she's homeless, she can't pay the fines, so she just keeps on bathing.


Apparently, a social worker has been trying to get Bille to go to a homeless center. . . but she refuses.


(Yahoo News / Bild.de)

TREKKIES REJOICE!

If what I'm about to say totally excites you, then I have some wicked rare "Magic: The Gathering" cards you might be interested in buying.

--All five "Star Trek" captains are getting together for the first time EVER for "Star Trek: Legacy". Unfortunately, this is NOT the new "Trek" movie that's in the works. It's not even a new "Trek" series. "Star Trek: Legacy" is a VIDEO GAME that's coming out this fall.


--But it will indeed use the likenesses. . . and the actual voices. . . of the captains from all five "Trek" series. For those of you who have lives that are lived predominantly ABOVE your parents' basements, those captains are:


--Captain James T. Kirk, from the original "Star Trek". . . (--Played by the great WILLIAM "THE SHAT" SHATNER.)

--Captain Jean-Luc Picard, from "Star Trek: The Next Generation". . . (--Played by PATRICK STEWART.)

--Captain Benjamin Sisko from "Star Trek: Deep Space Nine". . . (--Played by AVERY BROOKS.)

--Captain Kathryn Janeway from "Star Trek: Voyager". . . (--Played by KATE MULGREW.)

--And Captain Jonathan Archer from "Enterprise". . . (--Played by SCOTT BAKULA.)

DUETS... Life just got better

Fox has announced the celebrity lineup for the upcoming "Celebrity Duets". The following people will be paired up with LEGIT singers in a competition that's basically "Dancing with the Stars" meets "American Idol". Here are the contestants. . .


--"Xena" minx LUCY LAWLESS

--RICHARD "CHEECH" MARIN

--Former pro rassler CHRIS JERICHO

--"Fresh Prince of Bel-Air" SUPERSTAR ALFONSO RIBEIRO!!!

--JAI RODRIGUEZ of "Queer Eye"

--"Queer as Folk" star HAL SPARKS

--'80s minx LEA THOMPSON. . . (--Of "Back to the Future", "Red Dawn" and "HOWARD THE DUCK" fame.)


--The twist here is that the singers these stars will be paired with are just as recognizable as they are. . . and in several cases, even more so. They are:


--Belinda Carlisle, Macy Gray, James Ingram, Chaka Khan. . . (--Chaka Khan. It is VITAL that you always say her name twice.). . . Patti LaBelle, Smokey Robinson, Aaron Neville and Randy Travis.


--"Celebrity Duets", hosted by WAYNE BRADY. . . the one black man that all the white people in the office can agree on. . . debuts on Tuesday, August 29th.

DANCING WITH THE STARS ... Life is good

The stars for the third season of "Dancing with the Stars" have been announced. . . and the list DOES include some of the names we'd already heard, like VIVICA A. FOX and JOSEPH "DON'T CALL ME JOEY" LAWRENCE.


--But here's one that came straight outta left field: Daytime TV god JERRY "FREAKIN'" SPRINGER. (!!!)


--The other "stars" that will be competing are. . .


--"Saved by the Bell" Latino stud MARIO LOPEZ

--Former "Playboy" playmate SHANNA MOAKLER. . . soon to be the ex-wife of former BLINK-182 drummer TRAVIS BARKER.

--Annoying, formerly bow-tied MSNBC conservative political analyst TUCKER CARLSON

--"Clash of the Titans" superstar HARRY HAMLIN. . . (--his wife is LISA RINNA, who competed in the second season of "Dancing with the Stars".)

--Country minx SARA EVANS

--Pop skank WILLA FORD

--MONIQUE COLEMAN. . . from the Disney Channel movie "High School Musical".

--And former NFL running-back EMMITT SMITH (--As you no doubt recall, former NFL wide receiver JERRY RICE was last season's runner-up.)


--The new season premieres on September 12th at 8:00 P.M. on ABC.

The McRules and the McMeanies Posts

Joanna works at a McDonald's in Walker, Louisiana and she has some McRules for you to follow if you want to eat at her McDonald's!

Joanna posted "Things not to do when visiting a McDonald's" at McDonald's Talk, a Live Journal community where many McDonald's employees post their thoughts, stories, complaints and ideas about their employment at McDonald's. She has worked at McDonald's for 2 years.

She has removed her blog and info apparently from myspace.com because of the comments from readers after the site hit FARK.

The McRules

The Flav Is Back ...Like it or not

The first season of FLAVOR FLAV'S VH1 reality show, "Flavor of Love", became a SURPRISE HIT. . . and culminated in the now infamous incident in which PUMKIN hocked a loogey right in NEW YORK'S face.


It looks like the new batch of girls came into Season Two knowing they'd have to STEP IT UP if they wanted to make a name for themselves. . . because last night's season premiere started off with a vicious CATFIGHT. . .


And it ended with a girl MAKING STINKY on Flav's marble staircase!!!

Check out the catfight here and repeats of the premiere on VH1

See the video

Madonna... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

In a sold-out stadium just a mile from Vatican City, the lapsed-Catholic diva wore a fake crown of thorns as she was raised on a glittery cross during the Rome stop of her worldwide "Confessions Tour".

The Vatican had accused her of blasphemy and provocation for even considering staging the sham crucifixion on its doorstep, anger Madonna further enflamed prior to the show by inviting Pope Benedict to come and watch.

Here is a link to the full story if you have even a slight interest.... which you probably dont if you find her as irrelevent as I do.

Full story via CNN

The Celebrity Mother-of-the-Year candidate this week is. . . MELANIE GRIFFITH

Melanie was out with her daughter, DAKOTA. . . enjoying some lovely mother-daughter bonding time.


The two were outside of an L.A. store called Maxfield Wednesday. . . and were photographed smoking together.


The pictures show Melanie actually lighting a cigarette for Dakota while they were out.


Now, this might KIND OF be OK if Dakota was like, 25 or something. But she's not. No. . . she's only 17!!!

FOOTAGE OF PAMELA ANDERSON AND CINDY CRAWFORD GIVING LAP DANCES!

Check out the videos of these two middle-aged sexpots giving lapdances to their men -PAMELA ANDERSON and KID ROCK were still on that yacht in St. Tropez this past Monday.

CINDY CRAWFORD was there with her husband, RANDE GERBER, as well. The White Zinfandel must have been FLOWING that night, because the ladies got all HORNED UP and gave their men LAP DANCES.

Pamela Anderson Doin' It

Cindy Crawford Doin' It