Summer Couch Potato Programming

Summer usually sucks because there isn't a thing on the old boob tube unless you have a need to catch up on all the tv programs you missed. If you are like me and I doubt most of you are but I can only take so much of the Oklahoma heat then I need to head inside for some R&R. Forget the reruns folks because this year the Reality Shows are popping up on just about every network. Plenty of washed up rock stars, dead musicians, snobby rich and more are in the lineup. Here is a list of what will be coming to a TV near you:

Broadcast networks want to do more than show reruns all summer — but they don't want to spend much money, either. The result is reality-clogged schedules. If the networks are lucky, one or two might capture the public imagination.

Summer starts soon; the WB begins its heavily promoted "Beauty & the Geek" on June 1. As the title suggests, the series takes some socially challenged smart guys and couples them up with dimwitted lookers. The couple that works best together in various contests could share $250,000, and who knows what else?

"I wouldn't call it a reality show so much as a social experiment," said Jason Goldberg, who produced the series with Ashton Kutcher.

_"Hell's Kitchen" stars tightly wound British chef Gordon Ramsay, who's opening a new Los Angeles restaurant and chooses between contestants who want to cook there. Premieres May 30 on Fox.

_"Dancing With the Stars" will pair six celebrities, like boxer Evander Holyfield, with professional dancers to compete in a ballroom dancing contest. Premieres June 1 on ABC.

_"Hit Me Baby" exhumes has-been music stars who try to show a live audience they still have what it takes. The Knack, Vanilla Ice, Cameo, Tiffany, Wang Chung, Loverboy and Arrested Development are among the acts competing for charity in the NBC series, which premieres June 2.

_"The Scholar" will feature bright students competing for a college scholarship they might not otherwise be able to afford. No, they won't have to eat bugs: they have to show book smarts, compete in oral exams and defend themselves to an Ivy League scholarship committee. Starts June 6 on ABC.

_"Fire Me ... Please" films two people starting new jobs on the same day doing everything they can to be fired by midday. The person who wins will earn more than he could ever hope for from the job. Starts June 7 on CBS.

_"The Cut" brings 16 aspiring fashion designers to compete for a job with Tommy Hilfiger. The winner gets the opportunity to design a fashion collection under Hilfiger's label. Starts June 9 on CBS.

_"I Want to Be a Hilton." Fox still has Paris, but NBC has matriarch Kathy Hilton guiding 14 young contestants through the New York society scene. Whoever emerges as the winner of Hilton's contests gets to live the live of a rich person for a year. Debuts June 21.

_"The Princes of Malibu" is an Osbournes-style show that follows music producer David Foster, his new wife and adult stepsons Brandon and Brody Jenner, who move into Foster's 22-acre waterfront estate. The Fox series premieres July 10.

_"Rock Star: INXS." Super-producer Mark Burnett is behind this contest, where amateur singers compete for a job with the Australian rock band INXS, whose former singer Michael Hutchence died in 1997. The winner goes on tour and records an album with the band. Premieres July 11 on CBS, which will air the show three times a week until it's done.

_"Brat Camp," a remake of a popular British series, send six out-of-control teens to a boot-camp style program in the Oregon wilderness. The ABC series premieres July 13.

_"So You Think You Can Dance." Fox failed miserably with an attempt to hold a junior version of "American Idol," so now that show's creators are trying a dance version. You know the drill: embarrassing tryouts, pressure-filled performances and, finally, a winner. Starts July 20.

_"The Law Firm" on NBC is produced by David E. Kelley, who with "The Practice" and "Ally McBeal" is familiar with fictional lawyers. This show takes actual lawyers trying actual cases in front of judges and juries. Trial attorney Roy Black is the host for the series, which starts July 28.

_"Meet Mister Mom" sends stay-at-home moms on vacation and leaves clueless dads in charge of the house. Mom gets to watch the fun on closed-circuit TV. NBC, premieres Aug. 2.

_"Tommy Lee Goes to College" trails the photogenic rock star as he enrolls in the University of Nebraska — trying out for the marching band and cramming for exams. It starts Aug. 16 on NBC. No word on whether Lee will talk about the lawsuit he and his bandmates in Motley Crue filed this week against the network for barring them from NBC shows.

_"Welcome to the Neighborhood" brings prospective new families into a suburban cul-de-sac. The white families who live there now have their preconceptions tested with potential neighbors that include gay, minority and heavily tattooed couples. The winning family gets to move in. The ABC series doesn't have a premiere date yet.

_"Are You the Girl" chronicles the search for a new partner for Rozonda "Chilli" Thomas and Tionne "T-Boz" Watkins, the two surviving members of TLC after the death of Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes. They're looking to start a new group, and the search will be seen on UPN. No premiere date has been set.

If that's not enough, existing reality series like "Renovate My Family" (Fox), "Big Brother" (CBS), "Average Joe" (NBC) and "Wife Swap" (ABC) return with new episodes.

New scripted series will be scarce. However, ABC has the six-hour period piece "Empire," about ancient Roman rivals trying to succeed Julius Caesar starting June 28. And Fox's "The Inside" is a new cop drama focusing on the Los Angeles violent crimes unit.

Entertainment Report

Amazing Race Fixed?
Some of the viewers of the Amazing Race 7 finale are wondering if the race was fixed after an American Airlines pilot allowed contestants to board a plane after the door was sealed and the Jetway pulled away. Now second place finishers Rob Mariano and Amber Brkich are fueling the conspiracy theory. "I'm not saying anything," Mariano said on Live with Regis & Kelly when Regis Philbin asked him if he thought there had been a "plot" to help, Uchenna and Joyce Agu, win the million-dollar prize. "America can judge," Mariano laughed.

The incident that has people wondering if the fix was on, occurred when the final three teams tried to catch a flight to the final destination. Rob and Amber seemed to be a sure thing when they got on to an American Airlines flight about to depart from San Juan, Puerto Rico to Miami. After the plane's door had been sealed and the Jetway being pulled away, Uchenna and Joyce arrived and begged the gate official to allow them to get on the flight. The pilot was contacted and he agreed to bring the Jetway back and allow them onto the plane.

"When was the last time you ever have seen them close the door of a plane and then turn around and open it after they pulled the Jetway away?" Mariano asked Regis. "That pilot owes us a lot of money," Amber said.

A Federal Aviation Administration official told The New York Post that a pilot has the discretion on opening an airplane's door after it's been sealed. "It's the pilot's call," the FAA spokesman said. Under these circumstances "it's perfectly fine for the captain to [have] returned to the gate to pick up the couple."

Dead Man Lyrics
The lyrics to the Los Lonely Boys song, "Heaven," were left behind by a man in Garner Valley, California who killed five family members and then himself on Tuesday (May 10th). According to the Associated Press, investigators came across the lyrics next to David McGowan's computer, along with a note, which read, "Woe is me. I'm looking forward to seeing you in the next life."

Investigators said that McGowan, a 44-year-old investigator for the district attorney's office, shot his family members while they were sleeping -- Karen, 42, and mother Angelia, 75, as well as his children -- son Chase, 14, and daughters Paige, 10, and Rayne, 8.

A publicist for group had no comment, according to AP. "Heaven" won the Grammy award earlier this year for Best Pop Performance by a Vocal Duo or Group.

Maxim Magazine Hot 100
Lindsay Lohan, Jessica Simpson, and Ashanti are among the pop stars listed on the 6th Annual Maxim Hot 100 list for 2005. The best-selling men's lifestyle magazine publishes the list of women their editors think "have several things in common, a tremendous amount of buzz and heat surrounding them, undeniable beauty and a promise of greater things to come." The Number One spot went to actress Eva Longoria, star of the hit show Desperate Housewives.

Almost a third of the top 20 have record deals, with Lindsay Lohan at Number Four, Jessica Simpson at Number Nine, Ashanti at Number 13, Christina Aguilera at Number 16, and Beyonce Knowles at Number 17. Christina Milian, Ciara, Avril Lavigne, country star Shania Twain, and Kelly Clarkson all ranked in the top 50.

The list will be published in the June issue of Maxim, which will have Las Vegas star Vanessa Marcil on the cover.